is colonies getting into wars they can't win just the default colonial experience now...?

my NA colonies with me as britain seem to suicide themselves against the natives. they don't have manpower to fight and if its the natives declaring war on them im not called in automatically, as it used to be in older patches. is there a way to have them just be self sufficient without me babying them? feels like with modern eu4, the only viable way to colonize is to wipe out the natives but i wasn't setting out to play that way on my current run - dealing with europe and eastern expansion.