I lost my brother to OCD
In September 2024, I lost my brother to his lifelong battle with OCD. His final relapse was pedophilic OCD that grappled onto his daughter who is only a year and a half. Even going back and reading his journals, he brought up the fact he could tell the OCD was transitioning to the pedophilic thoughts about his daughter while he was going through a harm OCD relapse about thinking he committed a murder. He was afraid he would somehow get his daughter pregnant from diaper changes. Changing her diaper would take him anywhere from 30 minutes to over an hour due to his compulsions. He’d dealt with pedophilic OCD in the past when teaching young kids piano while also having relapses in harm OCD and existential OCD. I hate how this relapse made him decide the world was better off without him, and he just couldn’t take it anymore. Our whole family knew for a fact how great of a father he was. And we all knew he would NEVER do anything like that. I haven’t been diagnosed with severe OCD like my brother, but I do have OCD tendencies as well as ADHD. I’m not sure what support I need, but the loss of my brother has made me want to become more active in the awareness of OCD. His journal was confiscated by police, and my sister-in-law was told the kids “should be checked”. It’s absolutely heartbreaking for us to hear how a stranger who isn’t educated in OCD actually believes my brother to actually be a pedophile. I’m no longer a sister due to OCD. I no longer have my big bother due to OCD. I miss him like crazy, and it still doesn’t feel real most days. I’d been educating myself a lot before losing him, but now I can only think about the information/hope he couldn’t have known about now that he’s gone. I know once there’s determination to end one’s life, there is no hope being thought about…the main thing I want more than anything is for him to finally be at peace…
Has anyone here had any severe relapses they have been able to get through? I want to know there is hope even with OCD.