Read this if you got time on your hand (inter & friends)

I started studying for inter in November, completed about almost all lectures of costing, GST and 5 chapter of Audit and SM till now, something happened in first week of January that's taking too much space in my mind lately, so in dec randomly my female friend let's call her 'C' messaged me about something that was indicating that she loves me, she said 'ab samaj ja' I ignored all of that bs,

Then after that she used to send a lot of travelling reels and used to say apn sath jayege bus Mai aur tu and stuff like that

After that she started telling me about all her personal problems from periods to breast related stuff which I joked off about

She went to Pune and stayed there for a week or so and i somehow flipped ( cause she said ab sidha apn dono jayege jb tu free hoga ) she was there with some friend of her idk about her other friends neither her other friends know about me ig

She came back and I was preety okay like why should I care, but then as soon as she came back she called me up to pick her up and i said no to which she said tu aa raha hai n shit like that and I went, dropped her at her house n all,

After reaching home i somehow thought ki I am doing wrong I am not treating her right so I called her later that night and asked if she likes me, she said ki I knew it in the end teko 'bhi' mujhse pyar ho jayege. I mean wtf when did I said something like that?? I just asked her if she likes me and whole convo shifted to I love her 😭 i genuinely loved our friendship but, not her. I even told her that night ki you are not my type n thing (i was drunk)

Then two nights later she started Posting stories about love is about letting go n shit, so I called her again and asked ki if there is something in your heart bol de dekhte hai kya hota, she said " jaruri nahi maine tere liye hi Dali hogi" to which I said but you knew I would react like this to which she said yes I knew, then she said tu bata do you feel anything for me n all, n I said ki I really don't know but I am up for trying to which she said "dekha I knew it teko mujhse pyar hogaya hai" and said mai kaise teko haa bolu I have a "bf" (we had this convo in dec and she said she was lying about bf part) and now she's saying she has a bf, to which I said pretty dumb things and then asked "sb khatam Krna hai??" She said "please time de, sochti hu" to which I said nahi abhi bata and she said "yes, khatam Krna hai" I am fine with it but

One friend of mine is in Pune for next 10 months, another one is very busy, she was the only one who used to listen to me yap about my days and all the things that happened, we used to talk almost in 4-6 months gap period, she used to tell me apn 7th se best friends hai n all but I don't really remember her being there as my bf in class 7th to 11th, i didn't acknowledged her as my friend till like 12th and now I just don't want to let of remaining friends I hold dear

I don't want to be the fool here, she looks pretty n all but she's a complete red flag, she had a few relationships in school and so did i, i know everything about her personal to academic life (cause she tells me everything) And she knows about my relationships and other financial fuck ups

Thing is I really liked how i opened up with her about my fuck ups, she used to be all manly with me untill now

I really love her but as a friend, and she thinks I love her that way

I do study but all this has taken a toll on me, what should I do? I am really tired, I can't share anything with anyone anymore

I love talking to people but from last one month just couldn't and it's making me more anxious day by day

I have no friends left actually, i didn't clarify anything with her, haven't told her I don't like her that way, she's in her delulu(she thinks I like her), we just ended our friendship and now I really miss talking to her (she's completely opposite of what my type is so I just don't want to fall in love either)

It's actually so true you don't find same person twice even in the same person

I will be giving up on friendships as a whole with females i guess, i don't want to have the same feelings for anyone again

I don't think I will be talking to her unless she reach out first, so yeah it's a done deal ig, lost a friend with whom I was 100% me, I am sad

Also I plan to finish G2 with 1 rivision till mid Feb will that be possible excluding Audit as it's op par with lectures?

TL;DR:

I started studying for CA Intermediate in November and have made good progress in Costing, GST, Audit, and SM. However, since January, my mind has been consumed by issues with a female friend, "C," who seemed to develop feelings for me. She hinted at love, shared personal problems, and made confusing statements about our dynamic. I told her I don't feel the same way but was open to trying, which backfired when she brought up a "boyfriend." Eventually, we ended our friendship.

She was my go-to person for sharing everything, and losing her has left me feeling lonely and anxious. I miss the friendship, not her romantically, but I haven't clarified this to her. Now, I'm struggling emotionally, feel tired, and am hesitant to trust or connect deeply with female friends again.

As for my studies, I plan to finish Group 2 with one revision by mid-February, excluding Audit. Will that be possible?