I feel as if I was cheating on my boyfriend

For context, I (20F) have been dating my bf (20M) for a month, been official for a few weeks.

I have a friend (20M) who was my best friend during high school, he was there for me when I was going through anxiety and depression episodes and I was there for him all throughout his personal and family problems. His first love was his best friend, and his friendship with her ended because he confessed to her and blew up on her because she did not feel the same.

After his best friend cut him off he started hanging a lot with me, and yeah we bonded quite a lot. It’s always been purely platonic to me, whenever he was really sad or crying I offered my shoulder to cry on and a hug. All of our mutual friends have told me they think he is in love with me, frankly, I think he has some kind of feelings for me, but he promised himself he wouldn’t confess to any of his friends after the whole issue with his first love.

Last month we had a fallout, he got mad at me because I didn’t hang out with him as much as I used to and I didn’t text him as much I used to. (I’m in college and I’ve been busy). I didn’t want to lose him so I told him we should meet and talk about it. When we did he was all over me all the time. Hugging me all the time, kissing my head whenever I was within reach and honestly I was really uncomfortable and told him to tone it down and he just said “you’re as cold as always” and kept doing it.

Whenever I’ve talked to him about him toning it down he just laughs about it saying I’m really cold and keeps doing whatever he wants. I’ve also told him not to make certain jokes and to stop tripping me (for some reason he finds it hilarious even after I told him it hurts and to stop), he never listens.

When we hung out I wasn’t with my bf officially but now I am and he wants to hang out again. I feel really bad because I feel as if I was cheating, if my boyfriend did that to another girl I’d be pretty upset. How can I tell him to stop without seeming ungrateful? Please help